The heart of the dark

Today was a very interesting one, considering all I planned to do was go to the cinema and maybe take some pictures on the way if I felt like it.
When I got to Leicester Square I wondered if I might see Rob busking, but there was no-one playing there. It’s always weird going about the underground and half thinking I might bump into him. I don’t even know if he’s playing today though.
Anyway, I knew I wanted to walk down to Trafalgar Square, but it was really cold and I had an idea to look inside St Martin in the Fields church. I’ve never been inside, I wanted to last time I was there but it was closed. There was lots of scaffolding and boards up because they are doing renovation works, but I found my way past that and went inside.
It was the strangest thing; a church service was going on in Chinese. I know that they’re not huge on Christianity there, so I was really surprised to see the church was fairly full. More so than if it had been an English service, I bet. I stood at the back for quite a while just watching, and it was really beautiful. I haven’t been to church for a long, long time.
In a way I felt so lonely and out of place in the city I was born in that it made my eyes prick with tears, but behind that there was another feeling – one of elation. Sometimes mentally there is a feeling of darkness, with the heart of the dark shielding a great light. Almost as though there is an insight to be discovered, just out of sight, but you have to get really frustrated and low before you can reach it. That’s how I felt in that church; all lonely and sad, but as though I was on the edge of some great realisation, something dazzlingly good. The feeling is still with me, I don’t know what the insight is though. Maybe it will come to me. Or maybe it was just God saying hi.

After that I walked around Trafalgar Square a bit, and saw these groovy roller-skating people I recognised from Hyde Park! It’s been months, but I knew one of them by her face. They have a boom box thingy and just dance and skate around the the music. I think they were starting to get cold because there were only a few of them left, but they were brilliant and I got some lovely pictures.

Then I went to the Prince Charles Cinema and saw Run Lola Run, it came out a good few years ago but they were showing it as part of their Sunday Classics program. I’ve heard good things about it, but it was MUCH better than I thought it was going to be! I loved it. The cinema was full too and the audience giggled as one at the funny bits, which really pleases me whenever I’m in the cinema. One of the things I like about going to see films alone as when you identify someone in the auditorium with a distinctive laugh who has exactly the same sense of humour as you. Then you can laugh together without shame, and it’s just funny This happened when I saw Amelie there. I already knew the film inside out, but there was this old chap at the front who was delighted by it all, and he kept giving these great snorts of laughter that just cracked me up.
Anyway, digressing. When I came out I had a nice text which made me smile and feel all glad. I went shopping in china town for chopsticks and weird candy, and found these great biscuits which are basically hollow koala shapes filled with strawberry goo. Very nice…
And you’d think that would be enough for one day, wouldn’t you? But no. As I passed the Odeon, they were having the premier for Dreamgirls, and all the stars were arriving just as I went past. I couldn’t get very close, but I did find a space at the fence where I could take very far away shots of all the celebrities. Now I have photos of Beyonce’s elbow, Eddie Murphy’s ear, etc etc. Very thrilling. Then my hands got so numb I could hardly feel them, and I made my way home.

I was only intending to pop out for a quiet film. Sheesh…